Getting a better partner for an enduring and happy relationship takes more than a mere wish. It takes work. Actually, the work is more inwards – working first on yourself. To attract a better partner, you will have to first adjust your lifestyle and be more careful about the choices you make. 'Like', as it is often said, 'attracts like'. has compiled a list of what you need to know to attract a better partner. This list is by no way exhaustive.

Photo Credit: Sam Bloomberg-Rissman

Forgive yourself

To let go of your past especially unpleasant one, you will have to learn to forgive yourself. You cannot attract a better partner harbouring unforgiveness and bitterness. Know you have made a mistake and in life, mistake is inevitable. Learn from your mistake, forgive yourself and move on. An unforgiving heart will hurt you and you will end up hurting people around you. It is hard to attract a better partner with unforgiving heart.

Your past is past!

Yes, it is worth repeating, your past is past! You do not have to bring your whole past into the present. It has a way of blurring your vision, limiting you and making you too complacent. Also, some history is better deleted from the memory of your present. You cannot, for example, be thinking how you were raped, heartbroken, beaten up or abandoned or almost aborted by your parents, or how you used to rob or sleep around etc.  and attract a better partner. This kind of memory makes you see more of your weakness and easily makes you think you are no better and therefore you do not deserve a better partner.  See yourself as a new person and focus on the future.  Sometimes you have to make some hash or hard decisions to delete the past, namely, ending some relationship, changing location etc. Another way is by reading good books and getting a hobby.

Photo Credit: Brooke Cagle

Work on yourself

You need to develop yourself. No aspect of your life should be left behind. Although development is a gradual process, it needs constant work and patience. It must be deliberate and there is need also to believe in yourself. Start by dropping off that bad habit. It may be some negative addiction that will have adverse effects on your health like smoking, alcohol consumption etc. Some addictions impeach on our character and make us a turn off, example, promiscuity, dishonesty, fraud etc. while others have to do with our interpersonal relationship such as manner of communication, respect to people and their opinion etc. Whatever it is, learn to work on it and develop yourself to a better person. Sometimes you will need to ask family members and close friends to know what your attitude towards others is.


Talk your life, live your life!

Words are powerful. Cultivate the habit of saying only what you want to see happen in your life rather than the opposite. Also, words alone are not enough, live what you say. It may be hard at first but with constant practice, you will find it easy. Live your life one at a time. Do not carry to many burdens on your head or in any way try to compare yourself with people around you. Believe you are unique and heading somewhere. All this has a way of building your self-confidence, pumping energy into your life and reinforcing the decisions you have made to achieve your goals. Remember, your goal is attracting a better partner.

Finally, It is important to know that it is not all about memorising what are listed here but practicing them. Your dream partner is somewhere around you, go attract them!